6 Things you need to know if you feel stuck ,and keep making the same mistakes!

We can often notice patterns more clearly in the actions of others, particularly those closest to us. For instance, we see friends continually fall for the wrong person or unconsciously push away the right person. We cringe at some foolish behavior of theirs, such as an ill-considered investment or career choice, only to see them repeat the foolishness a few years later, once they have forgotten the lesson. Or we know someone who always manages to offend the wrong person at the wrong time, creating hostility wherever he or she goes. Or they crumble under pressure, always in the same way, but blaming others or bad luck for what happens. And of course we know the addicts who get out of their addiction, only to fall back in or find some other form of addiction. We see these patterns and they don't, because nobody likes to believe that they are operating under some kind of compulsion beyond their control. It is disturbing a thought. - Robert Greene.

Your thoughts can make you well: This is scientifically proven that stress hormones can pass down to your genes and make you sick. Since, stress is a byproduct of thoughts so if your thoughts can make you sick the question should be, can it make you well.

The answer is YES!

Imagine a situation where you feel stressed or agitated for a moment, say you are at a coffee shop and someone spilled some coffee close to your brand new shoes. That's stressful right, but thats a momentry stress.

Now imagine you have a coworker/friend who sits next to you, and is always in some way pushing your emotional buttons and keeping you stressed. What's gonna happen is, you are gonna be stressed, and when you are living in a sense of emergency (which by nature is called stress) you are robbing all the spiritual, physical and mental energy from yourself which is going to set you up for diseases. However, if you practice the right things and keep a tab on your feelings and thoughts (which sometimes feels impossible) you can actually grow.

In this blog I am going to talk about how to identify the negative loops of thoughts in life and how to work towards breaking them and creating the better ones.

-Your body is your secondary brain -Familiar past will sooner or later become your predictable future -Action-reaction is not the complete truth -Identifying and finding free will -Don't wait for divine powers to come in your life to set you free -The visions of the future -Practices to get you on trackl 1. Your body is your secondary brain : re As we know we humans have an average of 60,000 thoughts per day. 95% of these thoughts are subconscious, how do your thoughts get to your subconscious? Everything you experience in a pattern everyday, gets stuck to your subconscious and you eventually set your body clock for stress or feel relieved for that period of time.

For example, at 9:00 AM in the morning you have to be at work and the route you take is always jammed in peak hours and everyday the gets you stressed up, do that for a couple of years and your body is habituated to feel stressful 9:00 AM everyday. Even if you are not going to work on a weekday you will automatically feel hyper focused, and on the edge at that time. You must be thinking “So Shobhit do you want me to stop going to work and buy a jet”, well how amazing that would be. No! I am not asking you to stop going to work or stop taking that route. As I mentioned in my previous blogs as well. The consciousness of your behavior and thoughts defuse the anxiety at such an empowering level that you cannot imagine. This is something that cannot happen overnight. Years of pattern and response of our body cannot be changed overnight, but this can be changed over time. We will talk about it below. Lesson is: become aware of what triggers you and see through your thoughts and patterns and catch yourself repeating the same behavior and response, and that's where it will all start.

2. Familiar past will sooner or later become your predictable future : One thing that defines your day is , your MORNING RITUALS , if the first thing you do after you wake up is think about problems in your life. Thats a bad way to start off your day. In words of Dr. Dispenza , a Habit is a redundant set of automatic unconcious thoughts,behaviors and emotions thats aquired through repetitions. If you think about it, people wake up in the morning they begin to think about their problems. Problems are circuits of memories in the brain, each one of those are connected to people and things at certain time and places and if the brain is the record of the past, the moment they start their day they are already thinking in the past. So if your thoughts are tied to a bad memory, which is related to past experiences you will keep on recalling it and everytime you recall it, it will make you sad. As soon as you feel sad you will recall that memory again and you have designed a hamsterwheel of hell.

How you feel and how you think creates your state of being. So if you had a bad experience in the near past and all you can do is think about it, you are training your mind to fall in the same loop and eventually make that familiar past into your predictable future.

3. Action-reaction is not the complete truth : We always feel that every experience we have is a brand new experience and it has nothing to do with our past. Think about this, we tend to think about the worst in anything so much that we practically train our minds to fail while the execution. Remember in school, while reciting a poem, there is one para we are sure we are going to mess up at and no matter how much we practice we somehow mess up while execution. Think of it this way, for example you are going to run into a meeting which is very critical, business wise or impression wise and the pressure is on, if you keep thinking about what all is going go wrong you are simulating your brain with the practice of failure and when the actual time comes the failure will be a practiced response not by chance. You should tailor and prepare the star moments (moments you are going to shine bright) of the meeting for situations such as these, which will keep you motivated even if you miss the first mark.

Our thoughts are something which is beyond time. Not only you can think in the future but you can think of the past and while learning from the past and predicting the future you are acting in the present. How we act in our present is completely linked to our thoughts . The majority of things we do are already things we have trained our minds to do. By thinking the worst we keep pushing ourselves in the loop of emotional, financial and professional failures.

4. Identifying and finding free will : We Always believed that our actions are totally dictated by logic and unbiased thoughts and we are in complete control of what we do every day. But if you disconnect from your being and look at things from a distance you will realize that almost everything that we do is like a system programme. You wake up at the same time, you go the washroom, drink the coffee at the same time, meet and hangout with all the toxic people you do not want to be with, but still give them time more than you need to (which sometimes is highly driven by insecurities), deal with the same thoughts about your future, and how you are going to do better later on and do nothing and eventually sleep. We are mistaken by taking this as free will. This is programming that is done by society and ourselves over the generations.

I am not saying that this loop is a failure for everyone, but the courage and actions to build something outside this loop is something that fulfills the definition of free will. It can be that evening walk in the beautiful garden close to your house. It can be playing with your kids 30 mins a day, or like for me it's blogging. The lesson: the idea of free will is to find things that make you whole rather than things that are digging a hole in you and make you feel hollow and incomplete.

5. Don't wait for divine powers to come in your life to set you free: It's just like waiting to get sick in order to get a checkup done while regular checkups can keep you healthier. Because we are scared of the unknown of what if. We always wait for some sort of pain, suffering or loss to change , we feel that if everything seems fine no action needed , no need to tap on that untapped potential or that unknown problems we are dealing with everyday which has now become a daily routine and now doesnt even feel like a problem. Or worse, getting inspired by the movies that someone someday will meet you at the coffee shop or at the bar counter and they will change your life forever, that's never gonna happen. Even if you find someone in that coffee shop they cannot change your life around unless you want to.

Do you really want the change of your life to have a foundation of pain and loss or do you want to be completely dependent on the unknown to somehow magically change you. That's just your brain tricking you into staying on the same hamster wheel and dying out. Don't do that, today, you are healthy, and happy. Why not start it now with a foundation of ideas and happiness and I believe that has the potential to change everything.

6. The visions of the future: If you are not defined by the visions of your future that means your actions are the reciprocation of your past. if your actions are coming from your pain and expeience of what happened in the past you tend to live in the past, and turn your present similar to your past experiences.

In order to creat a new future, you need to do something which needs to be different from the past. This applies everywhere, at your work, life, parenting, business everywhere.

I always lived the same way i always had the same problems with my work , with my girlfriend with my family and friends. I always thought I am doing everything I posssibly can, may be its just not meant to be.

No future (which is now today) was created till I decided to do and experience things I have never done before or do things in a completely different way and not to approach them as I always did.

That created a loop of new experiences that led to new feelings which led to new thoughts and eventually I broke the pattern of actions I have been living for the past 25 years. Practices to get you on track Meditate , Train your body to align with your mind: It's scientifically proven that you can actually train your mind and body to do potentially anything. In order to break the loop you need to break the pattern of time and then thoughts, what you would want to do is sit down for 20 mins a day with your eyes closed and just see what runs through your head.

All you might see is- "what I need to cook for dinner". "There is no milk in the fridge". I "have a million emails to respond to" and you will feel restless, your body will push you to act on it. But just 20 mins will not change anything. The goal is to get your mind to a place where it is directing the body what to do and what not to do, and once you practice this over a period of time, your body will follow your mind which will give you a higher sense of control on your feelings and your thoughts and eventually your actions. Acknowledge: Once you are done with meditating and you have identified what is the root cause of your everyday anxiety. You work towards it. When you work on the problems and eventually solve them the first thing we create is mental peace but what we create after it is a lot of time. When we are stressed, we tend to do things slower because something is always running in our thoughts and we cannot focus too much, and eventually lose time in ordinary tasks. Or mess up ordinary tasks which now will take more time. Read:

I heard Will Smith saying this once, “any problem you face in this world is not one of a kind. Someone has definitely faced the same problems and must have mentioned about it somewhere, all you have to do is find it out. Choose your media (part 2) :

Social media is draining you our of your energy, looking at those beautiful vacations, houses, wifes and husbands we get to a place where we feel unfulfilled and get filled with inferiority complex and start unappreciated what we already have and when we start despising what we have we start getting frustrated and that leads you to a place where you feel like you have been mistreated by the world and get to “why god why” or “This is not fair” mode. sweat it out : Exercise improves mental health by reducing anxiety, depression, and negative mood and by improving self-esteem and cognitive function. Exercise has also been found to alleviate symptoms such as low self-esteem and social withdrawal. Health benefits from regular exercise that should be emphasized and reinforced by every mental health professional to their patients include the following:

-Improved sleep -Increased interest in sex -Better endurance -Stress relief -Improvement in mood -Increased energy and stamina -Reduced tiredness that can increase mental alertness -Weight reduction -Reduced cholesterol and improved cardiovascular fitness Treat yourself nicely :

There is no way you can expect to feel better looking outside. You have to do something for yourself to feel better and strong. Get yourself a spa or a drive. Treat yourself with things. Its fine when you become dependent on love from outside you will always find it insufficient. Start with yourself and analyze how you have been treating yourself.

“Be careful what you water your dreams with. Water them with worry and fear and you will produce weeds that choke the life from your dream. Water them with optimism and solutions and you will cultivate success. Always be on the lookout for ways to turn a problem into an opportunity for success. Always be on the lookout for ways to nurture your dream.”

― Lao Tzu